How We Gather
For the past week, I have found myself serving the United Methodist Church’s General
Conference as a Page. A Page, in this setting, is akin to a legislative runner as the work primarily
takes place up close and personal on the floor of each conference session, ensuring the voting
delegates have what they need, and that information flows with little disruption to those who
need it for the work of the whole to ultimately and seamlessly accomplish the goals of the
conference.
Without getting into the weeds of this process or the polity of the United Methodist Church, I
wanted to take a moment to reflect on how we as humans choose to gather, organize, and
fellowship with one-another. This process of how we do life together is what the fields of
psychology, sociology, and the like refer to as Systems Theory. This intrinsic manner of
organizing dates to the beginning of the reporting of humankind, as all creation came to be
organized in systems of connectionism. We know that systems are not intended to remain static
as evolutions in the system occur and often create stress fractures as a side effect of growth – and
as systems are created to do, the system adjusts.
What has struck me as curious on multiple occasions during the first week of this gathering is
how this subset of people operate in this ever-evolving and stress-fractured system. Unlike
organically created systems, this particular system has been created out of choice, and those who
continue to operate within this system have endured the test of time and continue to do so out of
choice. This choice to gather, organize, and fellowship is one that brings the highest sense of joy
and accomplishment to many, and simultaneously brings the most challenging and painful points
of harm and anguish to many – and the system adjusts.
The choice of how we gather and the system we choose to participate in is ours to make.
Whether we choose to gather with friends or family at the dinner table; or we choose to gather in
conference-style settings; or we choose to gather for worship in community or in solidarity; or
we choose to gather in protest; or we choose to gather over the simple elements of grape and
grain; We choose to gather…
So today, I invite you to take a moment to reflect on how you choose to gather. I encourage you
to reflect on the polarity between joy and accomplishments from systems you choose to
participate in, and the painful points of harm and anguish that these fractured systems sometimes
cause, because it is in the reflection of it all, where we find ourselves – and the system adjusts.
Blessings on this journey,
Kelly
www.ChrysalisCounselingForClergy.org
A Note of Retreat
In the hustle and bustle of everyday life, particularly in professions demanding emotional and
spiritual care like clergy, it’s easy to overlook the critical need for retreat. Yet, statistics on clergy
burnout and saturation serve as a stark reminder of the urgency to prioritize self-care and renewal
practices within our spiritual communities.
According to a study by the Schaffer Institute, around 1,500 pastors leave their ministries each
month in the United States due to burnout or conflict. In addition, anxiety rates among clergy are
13.5% (in comparison to 4.2% general population); 23% depression (8.6% in standard
population); 71% cannot name a meaningful hobby outside of the church; 71% cannot name
close friends; and 83% of clergy believe that pastoral ministry affects their personal relationships
negatively. These statistics are alarming, shedding light on the profound challenges faced by
clergy members in maintaining their well-being amidst the demands of their roles.
In the face of such sobering statistics, retreat emerges as a powerful antidote to negative clergy
wellness. Retreats offer clergy members the opportunity to step away from the relentless
demands of ministry, providing a sacred space for rest, reflection, and rejuvenation.
It is a standing principle of Chrysalis, that incorporating retreats into the rhythm of ministry is
not a luxury but a necessity which is why, last week, Chrysalis Counseling For Clergy held our
12 th Rest & Renewal Retreat encompassing 10 participants and presenters, representing 7 states
and 4 denominations. These spiritual leaders covenanted to prioritized retreat as part of their self-
care regimen, and by doing so, they have invested in their own well-being to ensure their
sustainability in the sacred work of serving others.
In a culture that often glorifies busyness and productivity, the importance of retreat cannot be
overstated, especially for clergy navigating the complexities of pastoral ministry. As we confront
the sobering reality of concerning negative clergy wellness statistics, let us recommit ourselves
to the vital practice of retreat – wherever you find it! – nurturing our souls, and safeguarding the
sacred flame of our calling.
May we heed the call to rest, renew, and return to our ministries with hearts replenished and
spirits restored.
Kelly