Ouvrons grand les Jeux: Games Wide Open!
Once every four-years, something a bit whimsical and nostalgic happens, and unless you are free
of all media and are perhaps living under a proverbial rock, you know I am referring to the
Summer Olympics! Since 1984 when the games were held in the City of Angels and proudly
touted its mascot, Sam the Olympic Eagle, I have been a dedicated consumer of the Olympic
games. Like many, I have my favorite events to watch, and I am always in awe of what the
human body, mind, and spirit are capable of as each are so openly displayed for all to witness –
and share our opinions and commentary on, even when we have no idea what we are talking
about.
I have always believed we can learn a great deal from the athletes who so proudly share with us
who they are – they are vulnerable and dedicated in ways we can’t always easily comprehend.
This year, another learning moment came to mind as I was comparing this year’s Golden Girls:
US Women’s Gymnastics Team, to teams of the past. There is simply something different that we
are observing this year, and I was having a difficult time naming what this thing was until I came
across a Ted Talk highlighting the differences between Belonging and Fitting In.
Belonging is about being accepted for who you are, feeling a sense of community, and knowing
that your authentic self is valued. It involves mutual respect, shared values, and a sense of
identity within a group. Fitting in, on the other hand, often requires conforming to the
expectations, norms, and standards of a group. It can mean suppressing or changing parts of
oneself to be accepted.
And there it is! What we are privileged to observe during the games this year, and at times be a
part of in our own lives, is what a community can be when the value of Belonging vs. simply
trying to Fit In is at play. When we truly allow those in our midst, including ourselves, be who
they and we are, the community is better for it, and it shows.
I am well aware that I have shown up in social circles, professional settings, and in ministry
trying to Fit In. In some cases, I kept-up the Fitting In Game going until the bitter end, but in
other situations, I allowed my authentic self to appear in an attempt to Belong. What I have
personally discovered is the importance of showing up Day One in an authentic way and not
being so concerned about Fitting In, rather Belonging in spaces that are authentic and true to who
I am and to the community.
My hope and prayer this day, is that we each find our authentic selves – always beautiful and
sometimes messy – and we know the joy of Belonging.
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